Dark Thoughts - Winter Blues

…. Im Herbst fallen die Blätter. Es wird schneller dunkel und das auch bei manchen Menschenherzen. Es geht dem Winter zu, was für viele dunkle , ja auch depressive Gedanken zur Folge hat.

The leaves fall in autumn. It gets dark faster and so does some people's hearts. Winter is approaching, which for many leads to dark, even depressive thoughts.

….

Winterblues

Für manche sind graue, dunkle Tage kein Problem, ja vielleicht sogar ein Genuss. Auch Kälte und Nässe stören sie gar nicht. Aber viele Menschen haben damit Mühe, wenn sich der Sommer und der bunte Herbst verabschiedet und dafür die graue Winterzeit bevorsteht.

Antriebslosigkeit, miese Laune und keine Lust für irgendetwas, das ist typisch für den Winterblues. So richtig depressiv sind die Betroffenen aber doch nicht. Es ist damit einfach eine saisonale Depression gemeint.

Da es meist noch dunkel ist, wenn der Wecker klingelt, kommen viele nur mit Mühe aus den Betten. Eine melancholische Stimmung macht sich breit. Dabei ist wichtig, dass wir es nicht zu einer depressiven Verstimmung kommen lassen. Eine solche zeigt sich an, wenn sich starke Müdigkeit, schlechte Stimmung, Mangel an Motivation oder auch soziale Vereinsamung erkennbar ist.

Es gibt unter uns Menschen, die nur in dieser winterlichen Zeit solche Symptome erleben. Bei uns in der Schweiz trifft es doch etwa 300K Menschen, die eine solche saisonale Depression erleben. Dabei trifft es vor allem solche, die früher schon depressive Episoden erlebt haben oder auch Personen mit einer bipolaren Störung.

Es werde Licht !! Die Weihnachtszeit ist voller Licht - Kerzenlicht aber auch Herzenslicht. Viele Menschen werden im Herzen mit Dankbarkeit, Familiengemeinschaft und Geschenken erfreut. Happy Christmas, liebe Freunde dieses Bloges. :-)

Let there be light !! The Christmas season is full of light – candlelight but also heartlight. Many people's hearts are filled with gratitude, family fellowship, and gifts. Merry Christmas, dear friends of this blog. :-)

Let There Be Light

People who react strongly to daylight also exert more effort when the days start later and end earlier. This quickly leads to an upset.

Can one escape, or even avoid, such upsets?

• People who can pamper themselves by treating themselves to something like a special meal, a game night, a hike in the mountains, a massage, etc., can quickly get out of a depressed mood.

• A healthy lifestyle with a balanced diet (see LLG), sufficient sleep and enough exercise is very helpful. Physical activity in nature is good for you holistically. During such active activity, the happiness hormones endorphin, dopamine and serotonin are released.

• Light is a great healing factor. Special lamps with a light intensity of around 2500-10000 lux can work wonders. Being in front of the light for about half an hour, perhaps eating something, listening to music or reading a good book, has a very positive effect that occurs after three to four days at the latest.

Anzeichen für eine depressive Verstimmung

Als solche Symptome gelten im Allgemeinen:

• Öfters auftretende Müdigkeit

• Gedrückte Stimmung, Freudlosigkeit

• Verlust an Interesse, Antriebsmangel

• Erschöpfung

• Sozialer Rückzug, sexuelle Unlust

• Anspannung

• Reizbarkeit, Nervosität

• Konzentrationsmangel

• Appetitmangel, Lust auf Kohlenhydrate (oftmals ungesund)

• Schlafstörungen führt zu erhöhtem Schlafbedürfnis

• Männer leiden oft unter

  • Kontrollverlust

  • Unzufriedenheit, Unruhe

  • Erhöhte Risikobereitschaft

  • Aggressives Verhalten

Menschen, mit derartigen saisonalen Depressionen sind nicht einfach nur ein bisschen traurig. Es bedeutet mehr: Es ist wichtig, solche betroffenen Personen ernst zu nehmen und sie zu unterstützen, damit sie nicht der Lebensfreude ganz verfremden.

These two young people are free from depression. Anyone who moves like this every day, i.e. experiences physical tension and relaxation through movement, will be free from mental distress. Interesting. The body can influence the soul.

Signs of a depressive mood

Such symptoms are generally considered to be:

• Fatigue that occurs frequently

• Depressed mood, joylessness

• Loss of interest, lack of drive

• exhaustion

• Social withdrawal, sexual dislike

• tension

• Irritability, nervousness

• Lack of concentration

• Lack of appetite, desire for carbohydrates (often unhealthy)

• Sleep disorders lead to an increased need for sleep

• Men often suffer

  • Loss of control

  • Dissatisfaction, restlessness

  • Increased willingness to take risks

  • Aggressive behavior

People with seasonal depression aren't just a little sad. It means more: It is important to take such affected people seriously and to support them so that they do not become completely alienated from the joy of life.

Live your faith

Anyone who has a belief and has already experienced it and applied it in everyday life has an advantage.

Such persons know that they can go to their Creator at any time. HE looks forward to every contact and takes our mood seriously and wants to help us get into a better mood.

PSALM 103 in particular can be of assistance here. Please try it next time.

Anyone who thinks about what happened on the cross will penetrate into the length, breadth, depth and height of God's love. It is universally highly significant what JESUS ​​accomplished for us on the cross: HE gives us the opportunity to accomplish with HIM in heaven forever - that is, eternally. Do you also accept this offer?

Four difficult Types of People

We're all different - and that's a good thing, isn't it? How nice it is to recognize and enjoy the otherness in our fellow human beings. Would be boring, we would all be the same !! So we are happy about our differences!

But there are limits somewhere. You have probably already noticed that. There are boundaries of humanity, of being for one another, which are sometimes clearly exceeded and then can hurt.

Work together

In business life in particular, these transgressions of humanity quickly become apparent. Even if there are many good talent management systems that provide information about personality, qualifications and interests, one always comes across types who stand out due to their "extremes". Sometimes you can enjoy it, but sometimes it gets under the skin and leads to digestive problems.

Changing their personality is probably not possible, but you can learn to deal with ‘difficult’ employees. This blog should help you with this.

The chemistry is (not) right

Many types of employees are encountered throughout a career, including difficult ones. With some, the chemistry is just right, with others, additional stress can easily arise. Not everyone can be sympathetic to you. Some show permanent excessive demands, cause constant restlessness through aggressive behavior and thus make themselves unpopular - perhaps despite high professional qualifications.

1. The Dominant Control Addict Type

Identifying Features

If you can support this type of person in their advantages, but also incorporate limits, then a lot is possible.

These people often come across as bully, are courageous and assertive, which is easy to get aggressive. They are impatient with others, demand more from others than they do themselves, and love their influence. Everything has to go according to your head. It can often happen that they have great ideas, can make difficult decisions quickly, but repeatedly cause unnecessary conflicts due to their narrow-mindedness. An often harsh tone makes this person unattractive in a social context. One avoids being near. (Link Choleric)

Good cooperation!

This type of person has some advantages that should be learned to appreciate. They respect others who are similar to them, who can hold their own, get to the point and are efficient. There is not much talk and gossip, but rather efficient work.

2. The Analytical-Obsessive Type

Identifying Features

This type is sometimes called the "bean counter". is actually a valuable part of any well-functioning organization. He adopts a methodical approach, loves logic and has very high standards. This makes this personality perfect for a lot of administrative work and dealing with numbers. But the often conservative attitude, the better knowledge and the love of detail, the careful and pragmatic approach that results, can make working in a team more difficult and hinder innovation. (Link Melancholic)

Good cooperation!

Analytical obsessives are wary of anything new or different. Many different fears can be their motivators. If changes are desirable or even unavoidable in the business or at home, early preparation and advance warning, both mentally and practically, prove to be a great advantage. Open communication about new techniques, tools and processes and the clear recognition of their advantages reduces the fear of the unknown.

If you want to praise this personality, it is best to avoid the word YOU and simply use a factual description of the performance. "I think this plan is excellent!"

3. The Expressive-Impulsive Type

Identifying features

They love the comedy, the enjoyment of attention and the lust for life. Everywhere you will find something positive to laugh about and enjoy. They always know something funny to tell and can enjoy little things.

This personality type has two completely different "faces". On a good day he is optimistic, full of good ideas and shows great energy for team morale. On the other hand, on bad days he is nervous, unpredictable and unreliable.

His greatest wish and trademark is to receive recognition for his work. Since his thinking is very related to the present, he often realizes the consequences of his behavior too late and then still refuses to take responsibility for it if something has gone wrong.

He enjoys the moment, the beauty of his own perception and the bigger picture, ignoring uncomfortable details and his own responsibilities. (Link Sanguine)

Good cooperation!

Let them know that you value their dedication, talents, and ideas. With challenges and tasks that require organization and structure, you can help these people to plan even larger tasks correctly through mind control and self-discipline and to focus on the essentials. Enjoy their positive attitude and indestructible optimism.

4. The Skeptical-Passive Type

Identifying Features

He loves to analyze comfortably. His passivity encourages the activity of others. His ability to optimize is valued and often makes life easier.

Skeptical-passive people are pessimists. Your glass is often half empty. This can easily spread to other people and lead to poor work and life morality, because negative things can also be easily contagious. Because this personality type can quickly identify problems and discrepancies, it also tends to "capitalize" on this knowledge and to criticize others. He finds mistakes almost everywhere and is happy when others get excited about it and look for solutions. He is a good spectator and can also handle certain stress with ease. (Link Phlegmatic)

Good cooperation!

This personality type is often inconspicuous and likes to hide from work. But if he feels pressure, he can surpass himself and perform very efficiently. They don't like arguments, so they love a peaceful mood. That is what they are committed to. They appreciate it when they have their say, when you listen to them and when they are left alone. You work in a highly solution-oriented manner so that the work can be done as quickly as possible.

Are You also an HSP?

It is said that 15-20% of all people are highly sensitive (HSP). In one way, high sensitivity is a kind of brilliance, but in another way it is also limiting. As an HSP, it is beneficial to understand the beauty of this gift as well as its limitations. Awareness is the first step on the way to a higher quality of life.

General Characteristics

Can you identify with some of these situations?

• Whenever you are sleeping away from home and a clock can be heard ticking, you have to get out of bed and stop the clock from ticking.
• Your eyes see more than others. Your peripheral attention reaches simultaneously from the far right to the far left. No mosquito escapes your scrutiny.
• Certain aromas put you in the mood; others drive you to distraction.
• Your skin does not tolerate every touch. Contact with certain materials and substances are impossible to bear.
• When you are hungry, you have to do something about it: either now, or immediately.

You’ve been there:  Sometimes there are situations in life when you ask yourself: ‘Why am I the way I am?’ Those are important opportunities to get a little closer to the truth. In the case of HSPs, a large portion is due to heredity, but is also influenced by the way they were raised.

Definition

High Sensitivity (also oversensitivity) describes a psychological and neurophysiological phenomenon.

High sensitivity can be defined as acute physical, mental, and emotional responses to external (social, environmental) or internal (intra-personal) stimuli. A highly sensitive person may be an introvert, an extrovert, or somewhere in between.

According Dr. Elaine Aron, “the highly sensitive person (HSP) has a sensitive nervous system, is aware of subtleties in his/her surroundings, and is more easily overwhelmed when in a highly stimulating environment.” HSPs are more aware of details in their surroundings, process them more comprehensively and react correspondingly with more intensity than the average individual. Until now there is no clear-cut and generally accepted neuroscientific definition of the phenomenon of high sensitivity. Neuroscientists attribute this circumstance to the fact that research in the area of high sensitivity is still in the early stages of development.

Feelings and Experiences Go Deeper

In HSPs, practically every impression of the senses can be felt with more intensity and in more detail. A higher intensity of awareness of moods in surrounding individuals is also often reported. HSPs often recognize themselves as more comprehensive and thorough in their analytic skills with a tendency toward spirituality.

Highly sensitive people often “feel too much” and “feel too deeply.” Thus, stimuli are generally remembered with more intensity and emotion. The manifestations of these feelings are often mistaken for nervousness and excitability, though the presence of these two traits is not necessarily a criterion for high sensitivity.

Characteristics of HSPs

According to Psychology Today, the following characteristics are often observed in highly sensitive people:

Category One: Sensitivity About Oneself

1. Often has difficulty letting go of negative thoughts and emotions

2. Frequently feels physical symptoms (i.e. stress or headache) when something unpleasant happens during the day

3. Often has bad days that affect eating and/or sleeping habits in an unhealthy way, such as eating or sleeping too much or too little

4. Often experiences tension or anxiety. 

5. Tends to “beat oneself up” when falling short of own expectations

6. Is afraid of rejection, even in relatively minor situations

7. Compares self with others often (in physical, relational, social, work, financial, or other scenarios), and experiences unhappy feelings from negative social comparisons    

8. Often feels anger or resentment about situations in life or in society which seem unjust, aggravating, or simply annoying

Category Two: Sensitivity About Others

1. Often thinks/worries about what others are thinking
2. Tends to take things personally
3. Finds it difficult, when triggered by relatively small unpleasantnesses with people, to just “let it go”
4. Feels hurt easily
5. Often hides negative feelings, believing they are too strong, turbulent, embarrassing or vulnerable to share; keeps a lot of negative emotions inside
6. Alternatively, often discusses negative emotions with others because there’s a lot of “drama” in one’s life
7. Has a hard time accepting critical feedback, even when it's given reasonably and constructively
8. Often feels like people are judgmental, even when there’s no strong evidence
9. Often overreacts to real or perceived slights and provocations
10. Often feels awkward in group situations and feels unable to be oneself
11. Feels self-conscious in romantically intimate situations; excessively worries about partner’s approval; is unreasonably afraid of being judged or rejected by partner

Category Three: Sensitivity About One’s Environment

1. Feels uncomfortable in large public crowds, in a room full of people talking, or when too many things are occurring simultaneously
2. Feels uncomfortable when exposed to bright lights, loud sounds, or certain strong scents
3. Startles easily at sudden noises, fast traffic, or other unpleasant surprises
4. Often feels upset when watching or reading negative news in the media. Dislikes “shock” entertainment (i.e. intensely scary or violent shows)
5. Often feels unhappy when following people’s posts on social media

Some more Characteristics

• an especially finely tuned perception (many-faceted fantasy and thought processes)
• higher sensitivity to pain
• greater awareness for details
• highly enthusiastic, multilateral in interests
• high sense of responsibility, very conscientious
• pronounced long term memory
• fine psychosocial perception (sensitivities, moods and emotions of others are quickly recognized, including details)
• easily influenced by the moods of others
• strongly intuitive
• simultaneous recognition, combination and processing of many details in a given situation
• long emotional „afterglow“ of experiences
• ability to grasp the bigger picture
• pronounced altruism (selflessness), sense of justice, strong sense of values
• strong need for harmony and a desire for independence
• experiences art and music deeply
• tendency to critique oneself and to perfectionism
• usually a many-faceted, complex and stable personality

Living in the age of information is challenging for many people, especially for HSPs. In order to avoid becoming a victim of the flood, they must learn to set hard, fast and hopefully reasonable boundaries.

The Five Senses of HSPs

The following situations can be observed:

Hearing

o ticking clocks are unbearably distracting
o someone snoring causes misery
o hearing repetitive sounds is torture
o hearing music through walls or someone else’s headphones is disturbing
o all these attention-getters, seen as constant advertising, is over-stimulating
o loud discussions cause discomfort

Smell

o odors can be very irritating (strong perfume)
o stores with certain aromas can be repulsive
o HSPs don’t eat everything: they are a bit finicky

Touch

o their skin is sensitive to sunlight
o certain fabrics are extremely uncomfortable                                                             
o when the skin is touched in a careful way, touch is appreciated

Sight

o bright lights must be avoided, if possible
o they sleep best in the dark
o 80% of all stimulation occurs through the eyes. Blinders can be helpful for relaxation.

Taste

o HSPs can have strong reactions to alcohol and caffeine – a little goes a long way!
o Regular meals are paramount, because hunger is not a good option
o They have definite culinary preferences

One place where HSPs feel well and at peace is outdoors. The more, the better. This peaceful, quiet, fascinating bouquet of natural colors can bring troubled hearts back into balance. HSPs especially enjoy these benefits at Sonnmatt for relaxation and regeneration.

HSPs and Relationships

Relationships are a special gift for HSPs and at the same time they can be challenging. The strong emotional ties and passion experienced can lead to disappointments at times, which can be painful. HSPs want their partners to make them happy and can easily forget that happiness must flow from within, that is by giving instead of taking.

If they always expect others to make them happy, they can never become happy. In the matter of passing the buck for their lack of happiness, they are true professionals. Because they are highly sensitive, they can take things personally when they get off balance. They expect complete happiness in their relationships, not realizing that happiness is not a gift, but must be worked for.

Common Reactions

HSPs often withdraw from their very active world of relationships. They love being alone and are quite content with themselves. They use this time to process the flood of information received.

When HSPs enter a group, they can feel the mood. They feel drawn to other HSPs. 'Normal' people can seem boring to them, because the conversation just doesn’t go deeply enough for them.

Sensitivity is also experienced in sexuality. HSPs need patient and compassionate partners in order to enjoy a fulfilling sex life.  Life with a mature HSP will never be boring.

Tips for HSPs

1. Use your uniqueness as a blessing for your community.
2. Your qualities of charity and empathy can do a lot of good in the world.
3. Once in a while, take time to think about your expectations toward your nearest loved ones.
4. Keep stimuli under control – breaks can be helpful.
5. Don’t plan every minute; take time to be alone.
6. You need at least one free day a week and well-spaced vacations.
7. Accept your limits and also your uniqueness.
8. You have special access to God’s love – a wonderful opportunity to let yourself be healed.
9. Don’t forget: Forgiveness is a characteristic of a high quality life!
10. Self-reflection is a key for growth and maturation.

Tips for Living with HSPs

1. Accept and enjoy the difference.
2. Be careful not to try to manipulate or give them orders.
3. Speak softly.
4. Enjoy and profit from their creativity.
5. Give clear signals – transparency in communication can facilitate associations.
6. When you need advice, an HSP can usually help.
7. When a call for justice is acutely manifested, it is better to let him have his or her way than to hurt his or her feelings.

HSP TEST

If you would like to find out how sensitive you are, you can click on this link:  TEST

By the way, there are also about 100 species of animals that are recognized as highly sensitive. Most of them are privileged to live in the beautiful out-of-doors. Maybe that’s a hint that it’s time to go for a hike in the mountains? You’re welcome to come and try out our beautiful mountains in eastern Switzerland!

EQ and Faith in the 21st Century

What has become of the Church over these 2000 years? Has it been replaced by more important values from the post-modern era? Have we built our own bridge from belief to capitalism? Is there still any real, reasonable belief? What does this faith look like? What characteristics would you give it?

Perhaps you, dear reader, were able to read the previously published blogs on EQ. For new readers I would like to recommend the following links:

EQ-Definition - EQ-AreasOfLife - EQ1-MarriageAndFamily -

EQ2-Job - EQ3-Health - EQ4-EveryDayLife

As a reminder: The five areas of social life:

1. MARRIAGE u FAMILY (mutual understanding based on self-image)

2. PROFESSION (dealing with colleagues, subordinates, with the boss, motivation)

3. HEALTH (healthy lifestyle promotes frontal lobe development)

4. ENVIRONMENT (privacy, public and society can see added value)

5. SPIRITUALITY (understanding and dealing with belief in a postmodern context)

Spirituality has taken root in our society. Different churches, institutions and religions ensure that our 'search for truth' is partially satisfied. But our social maturity does not testify to a good quality of our spirituality. There's a lot more to it. Luther discovered this 500 years ago and took action. Where do we stand today with the Reformation?

5. Last topic: Spirituality in our Time

Those who do not deal with faith at all and rely on the basis of evolutionist theory have some fewer challenges, but also some loss of quality of life. To do this, he will have to do without life after life entirely.

However, those who deal with biblical spirituality, possibly on a daily basis, sometimes have to endure some spiritual and spiritual battles. Not easy, but rewarding.

Man in Postmodernism

It seems important to me that we understand ourselves better. Important questions can be:

• Why am I the way I am?

• Why do I think this way and not differently?

• Where do my inner and outer values ​​come from?

Anyone who is close to the subject of 'education' as parents or at work knows that most things can be 'programmed' in us. We all go through a post-modern development system from which we cannot or can hardly protect ourselves. Most of it we are not even aware of. Unfortunately, otherwise we could defend ourselves if necessary.

Our children, as diverse as their talents and gifts may be, are geared towards one goal: to serve the economy. This defines their needs. The teaching objective is based on this. They must be able to meet postmodern demands. Our society demands it.

The question arises to me:

1. What are the Characteristics of Postmodernism?

My summary looks like this:

• Consumption (We are geared towards consumption. Shopping, media, sex, pleasure, holidays, )

• Individualism (Today's motivational question is often limited to: "What's in it for me?" We are thus designed for profit. There is no loss. Helping someone out of sheer altruism is unlikely for postmodern people.)

• Extrinsic motivation (We have given up our intrinsic motivation, practiced from birth, and have it replaced with an external one. We are motivated from the outside. The economic monopolies and politics determine our purchases, our behavior, our freedom, our values ​​... Intrinsic thinkers quickly become labeled as lateral thinkers, extremists and as 'Persona non grata', because society and tradition cannot dissuade them from their path of happiness.) (BLOG)

• Break with traditions (At the moment, this tendency is particularly noticeable in the family area. Our new gender generation is given so-called 'freedoms', from which our tradition and moral understanding had recently protected us.

• Relativity (The question of what truth is can no longer be asked today, since there is no longer any absolute truth. This question is irritating and repulsive. Everyone has their own style, their own version. Whether something is fake news or not is a matter of fact almost no role anymore. Nobody gets upset or would advocate true transparency with moral motives.)

• Living in the NOW (we have forgotten to learn from the past. Aligning ourselves to a stable future is not an issue. If we were, it would have an impact on our educational system. We would want to build a better future. But no. It works the other direction.)

• Appearance before authenticity (Postmodern people attach great importance to their appearance. The clothes, demeanor, certificates, the car as a status symbol are extremely important. Authenticity is neglected. Everything is made up, artificially brought up to scratch. Where are the values ​​how Naturalness, integrity, willingness to forgive and, last but not least, emotional intelligence that can genuinely connect people with each other?)

• Knowledge before application (We are satisfied when we have read something interesting. Applying it, integrating it into life - be it on the occasion of a serious presentation in the church - that hardly comes to mind. Knowledge is queried, not the Application of it. Is that biblical?)

The elderly among us have seen firsthand how our society has changed in recent decades. It seems to me that the speed of change has increased. The new generation is very neglected when it comes to developing the frontal lobe (BLOG). We are all challenged!

2. What are the Characteristics of Healthy Spirituality?

Postmodern then means that we are human beings who tend not to opt for absolute values, who do not see any great sense in serving basic attitudes, and if so, then we find it at most interesting. Put into practice, it usually doesn't happen. We needed help with that.

Now that we understand each other a little better and have positioned ourselves in the contemporary context, we want to consider what faith, the Christian faith, is actually about.

a) Basic Biblical Values ​​and Statements

Bible quotes are not for everyone. Personally, I did my homework and looked at this topic carefully. My conclusion: the basic text of the Bible is reliable. The translations are of varying quality. Recommend Schlachter 2000, Elberfelder and Luther.

Here is an attempt to make a statement about the Christian faith with two scriptures:

1. John 3:16> God so loved this created world of his own that He sent his own Son so that, if we accept His offer, we may be redeemed from our misery and be rewarded with a timeless, eternal life.

Isn't that a sensational offer? The possibility for everyone to get a life after this life is unique! The postmodern question of 'what's in it for me?' is answered generously.

What it means for God, however, to sacrifice his own son for us, for you and me, so that this gift becomes possible, is probably a little too difficult to understand for our thoughts and feelings. Understanding this better and better leads to a better understanding of the term LOVE. Whoever dares to do this will meet God.

2. Galatians 5: 22-23> Since God knows that we could not choose our parents, our country, our culture or the religious context, He offers us the following qualities of life because of his grace and our willingness:

• Love (Many people grow up subjectively unloved and deficient. All of us have the opportunity to fill up our love tank through close contact with HIM.)

• Joy (Paul writes: “Rejoice at all times, and again I say to you: Rejoice.” Our vertical connection helps us to do this, because it teaches us to become independent of circumstances and to respect eternal values ​​more and more.)

• Peace (To find inner peace, what a gift. Many people would or spend large sums of money on it. HE promises that whoever seeks HIM will find HIM. There all of us can be picked up.

• Patience (Would you like to be even more patient? This secondary virtue changes our relationships as well as the others. Those who have the patience have the right attitude. This is conveyed to us more and more by the Holy Spirit, for example by not following the circumstances in a human way, but in a divine way.)

• Friendliness (by considering the circumstances just mentioned, it is possible to be friendly even in difficult moments. Even loving enemies is possible!)

• Kindness (He who has understood and experienced God's goodness and grace cannot help but be kind. Such kind people will not be exploited, as they will also increase in wisdom. This is connected with emotional intelligence, especially active empathy and social competence. )

• Faith / loyalty (So we can also come to God in disbelief and pray for faith. If we are serious, then anything is possible. Loyalty indicates a constant ability to have relationships. You don't just throw relationships away.)

• Meekness (gentle courage, courage to act, to improve, gentle, controlled, benevolent, considered, constant and far-sighted. Wonderful.)

• Self-control / self-discipline (Anyone who gets to know God's values, i.e. laws, who deals with his creation as an act of love and recognizes the natural laws laid in us humans, wants to treat all of this with respect and not destroy himself. A healthy lifestyle is the result. The frontal lobe becomes strengthened and with that God can give us this discipline that will help us prepare for His soon coming.)

There is of course a lot more to mention. The four Gospels contain such profound wisdom and advice. Do not miss that.

All these good qualities can be picked up HERE, at the CROSS, at JESUS. Isn't that sensational?

b) The biblical image of God helps

God is love

• What do you mean by love? We talked about it on two blogs: Conditional and Unconditional Love

• If you were to commit your own life for that of one of your relatives, for example a blood transfusion for one of your children with the loss of your own life, that would go way beyond the postmodern understanding of love, wouldn't it? What if someone did this for you?

• Jesus, and what HE did for mankind 2000 years ago, is historically relevant and therefore shows much deeper dimensions of love. The knowledge of this love is our potential for eternity.

• In order to open oneself to this world of love, it is recommended to read the last chapters of the Gospels Matthew, Mark, Luke and John, if possible with a pleading attitude.

  God is our Redeemer

• Scripture speaks of a universal struggle. It's about the angel Lucifer, who with a third of the angels has made himself an opponent of God. This is how the term 'sin' came about. This sin leads to death. Sin is a basic attitude that wants to be independent of the life-giving God and therefore strives for autonomy. This leads away from God and therefore into death.

• This fact moved God to offer us a solution, a salvation. As described above, he dies this death for us, for you and me and thus enables us to offer us the gift of eternal life. With this we can be redeemed thanks to the love of God.
  

  God is threefold - Father, Son, Holy Spirit

• Many theologians quarrel on this matter. For me it is biblically obvious that Jesus as 'Son of God' - whatever that means universally - has taken on this most difficult task of the act of redemption. With this HE has redefined the depth of God's love.

• The function of the Holy Spirit is described in many biblical passages. He seems to be concerned about direct communication with us humans. He speaks to our frontal lobe when it is still intact. He likes to help us practically when we ask for His support.

• Jesus himself calls God his Father. Why shouldn't we do that too? Many people have difficulty doing this, however, because their human father image has suffered so much that they are unable to think of a loving Heavenly Father. But that can change.

It takes humility to personally accept such an act of love. Not all people are ready for it. Unfortunately. Otherwise it would look different in this world. Because this universally galactically relevant act has consequences, effects, consequences. This is where the spirits part about eternal life or death.

C) my contribution to faith

The Bible clearly speaks against righteousness based on our works. We cannot be saved by our works. Nevertheless, they play an important role. How does the process of salvation actually work?

1. What should we NOT do?

• Do not despair with this question.

• Do not use any literature to investigate this question. Take the Bible, please.

• Don't think that you have to be 'good' before you can get in touch with Jesus. The biblical stories show very clearly that HE showed interest especially in those who did not see themselves as 'good'.

• Never let anyone discourage you on this path. It is clear that the enemy of men (Satan) has no joy when someone chooses the friend of men (Jesus).

2. What should we do?

• Micah 6:8 "You have been told, man, what is good and what the Lord asks of you. That is, to keep God's word and practice love and be humble before your God."

• Isaiah 45:22: "Look at me and you will be saved."

• The final chapters of the four gospels help us to see HIM and what HE has done for you.

• If the love of God in Jesus has spoken to us, then HE is happy and waits until we acknowledge HIM and become a team. Many people testify to this process in baptism, just as Jesus himself did.

• Jacob 2:22 says that the works make the faith perfect. Works are important. But they should be a consequence of love. Our motivation counts for God. (Prov 16: 2)

• In order to know the truth, we must seek it with all our hearts and be ready to follow it.

• God has given us the power of decision (free will). We should practice this ability by adjusting our decisions to God's Word every day. When we do that, He will direct our will and our deeds according to His pleasure.

Following Jesus is sometimes associated with great challenges. It is HIS interest that through this our character can prepare for his return. After all, HE has already prepared an apartment for us!

1. Where are the limits crossed?

• A life with Christ will sooner or later lead to the realization that we cannot rely on ourselves. So the process of giving up on yourself and giving the place to Christ within us is the only solution. Whoever does not come to this insight and is not ready for it, for whatever reason, will ultimately not be 'recognized' by Christ. This process is a big challenge.

• God has given us free will. Constantly using this against God can lead to the fact that one is programmed in such a way that a change is no longer possible. However, this depends less on age than on conscious or unconscious involvement with the occult side.
  

  2. How do we keep the balance?

• As long as Jesus lives in the heart, His presence can be felt. This creates good and pleasant words. Anger and attachment go away.

• Developing awareness that thoughts produce action. This can lead to habits that ultimately affect character. This daily reflection on our thoughts and actions and their focus on Jesus allows us to keep our balance.

• When we make mistakes, the best place is the cross where we can unload everything. HE helps us to stop making these mistakes sooner or later.

• The awareness that we are God's children and therefore even have bodyguards promotes our daily decisions.

• "Rejoice, and again I say to you: Rejoice!" That's how excited Paul is about Jesus. All the circumstances can no longer make him sad. He has learned to deepen his relationship with Jesus so that all circumstances are measured by divine standards.

• Live the healthy lifestyle that has been spoken of many times. Living healthy promotes the frontal lobe. With it God can communicate better with us.
  

  EQ and spirituality

• You have probably noticed that when it comes to living a Christian life, it is actually about active empathy and social skills.

• Those who have a high EQ have the potential for a mature living out of Christianity and are wonderfully suited to be a missionary of God.

• Charity is the foundation of emotional intelligence as well as Christianity. Egoism disturbs EQ in the same way as it makes life more difficult.

Those who want to live charity have some important decisions to make. No trophy can be achieved with this. Maybe even rejection. But standing up for others makes you happy inside. Selflessness is a virtue that is divine. The reward will follow later.

Congratulations on making it to the end. God bless you, dear reader.

Improve EQ in Everyday Life

EVERYONE can contribute something that can support something to the common good. How does it work ?

Perhaps you, dear reader, have already read the previously published blogs on EQ. The following links are recommended for new readers:

EQ0-Definition - EQ0-AreasOfLive - EQ1-Marriage and Family - EQ2-Job - EQ3-Health

As a reminder: The five areas of social life:

1. MARRIAGE u FAMILY (mutual understanding based on self-image)

2. PROFESSION (dealing with colleagues, subordinates, with the boss, motivation)

3. HEALTH (healthy lifestyle promotes frontal lobe development)

4. ENVIRONMENT (privacy, public and society can see added value)

5. SPIRITUALITY (understanding and dealing with belief in a postmodern context)
   

4. High EQ in my Social Environment

Three examples

1. There may be your neighbor who is just difficult to get along with. He doesn't say hello, runs over you with exaggerated ramblings and lets himself be carried away to inappropriate, even untrue comments. How can you help him?
   

2. There's the church member, a woman in her sixties. She acts dominant and disrespectful, although she actually has nothing profitable to say. And that for 12 years. Can you turn it off somehow ?
   

3. There is our choir director. A great guy. Whatever he says has hands and feet. His sayings reveal wisdom and social intelligence. Incredible his empathy with which he can tune us into our songs and sensitize us. He is loved by everyone. Where did he get this gift from?

Classical music usually has a proven positive influence on our brain, our emotional world and our balance. Anyone who has the privilege of playing an instrument, if possible from an early age, has fundamental advantages.

Bringing in feelings is not a problem if they are balanced and do not go overboard. In a social context, reason and feelings are important. If they are lived in balance, this promotes community among people. Such people are valued by everyone else. A wise person betrays himself through his social intelligence. What do you mean with that?

Empathy + Social Skills = Social Intelligence

Daniel Goleman says that social intelligence is an important interpersonal part of emotional intelligence.

This interpersonal intelligence can be seen, for example, in the following skills:

• Organize groups

• Influence group activities

• Willingness, leadership and thus responsibility

• Being able to inspire and motivate others about something

• Bringing solutions into a process

• Negotiating, mediating or preventing conflicts

• Being able to establish a personal connection with outsiders

• Perceiving and understanding feelings, motives and worries of others (social analysis)

Outsider

People who have poorly developed these skills or who have not developed these skills are prone to interpersonal problems, appear uncomfortable and can easily be labeled as outsiders by society. It often happens that such individuals are oblivious to a group's emotional agenda and tend to take a lot of self-attention. To the chagrin of group development. Or they hide wherever they can.

Sometimes it is necessary not to go with the current flow. Namely when the flow is traveling in the wrong direction. Our world situation shows that one cannot rely on the majority. An emotionally intelligent, wise person feels when he has to leave the majority and when not.

Social Chameleons

These people are adept at adapting their feelings to the needs of the group, as we often do with actors, salespeople, diplomats and politicians, but they cannot find the balance between their own needs and feelings. You have not developed your own identity or it is underdeveloped. They are dependent and have hardly any integrity in their backpack.

Chameleons are under animal welfare because they are endangered. They are mostly iguana-scale lizards and live mainly in Africa. They have interesting advantages: Their eyes can look back, to the side and to the front at the same time, which symbolically can be interpreted as a foresight into the past, present and future. This is an important skill for EQ enthusiasts.

A lack of social intelligence can also show up as follows:

• reduced willingness to trust someone

• own area of responsibility is neglected

• Tendency to be wrong

• ruthlessness

• Selfish lifestyle, no willingness to serve

• Dogmatic inflexibility, even fanaticism and extremism

• general learning disabilities

• proud personality structure

Social competence, on the other hand, is shown as follows:

• social harmony - peacemaker

• Interest in efficiency (profitability) and effectiveness (efficacy)

• Tolerant attitude

• Good warning and admonition skills

• Interest in learning processes

• Good service provider

• humble personality structure

“An honest heart bears fruit in humility”

The increase in COURAGE is HUMILITY. Unfortunately, this attitude is not so well known these days. It changes people and makes them wise, far-sighted, and happy people. Have the COURAGE for HUMILITY.

Some Tips

1. Become aware of where you still have learning fields and development potential in everyday social life.

2. Decide to improve one and / or the other finding.

3. Learn to limit yourself to the factual and informational level in a discussion and to exclude the personal character level (communication is important).

4. Observe your own reactions and find any hidden fears that have led you to unwise words or deeds. Consciously replace these fears with loving motives and remember this. A reminder a day or week will help you make this a habit.

5. Take an interest in those around you, especially difficult people. Personal interest in their needs sooner or later makes them friends.

6. Try to stay in balance, not to apply unnecessary pressure, to integrate the situation and the needs of a thing and / or person as possible.

7. Active listening enables you to show respect for those involved.

   Do not forget:

With a healthy lifestyle, especially with NEWSTART PLUS ® (LINK), you promote your performance and willpower in implementing such resolutions.

Important cornerstones are:

• 1.5 - 2 liters of water per day

• Jog 2-3 times a week

• a lot of vegetable and wholesome food as unrefined as possible

Changes are best enforced when they are made in a health context. This strengthens the frontal lobe (LINK), which creates new potential. Take this chance.

I wish you success! :-)