Some tips in dealing with the man's world - an interesting - challenging and sometimes amusing world.
My Lady Terri-Lynn writes:
Dear women!
At the beginning, when Ernst asked me to write something for his blog, I thought, “I can't do that.” But the more I put myself into the subject, the more I got pleasure: I hope you will find it with Read like this ...
When I was a young girl, I listened to music a lot. One song that I really liked was a country song:
"Stand by Your Man!"
The song was about loyally standing by the husband's side and supporting him through thick and thin, even if he makes a mistake. After all, he is only a man (human).
As a teen I was very impressed by this song, and the desire grew in me to stand next to my husband, although I still had no idea who he would be.
I met him when I was 20. He was big and beautiful, musical, sporty and funny. More importantly - he was intelligent - the smartest I knew until then! The list of its merits could be expanded, but these adjectives should suffice.
It didn't take long before I was blown away. He was the first man (actually the only one) I wrote a song for. This is how it started:
I met a boy - I fell in love:
He’s everything that I've been dreamin ’of.
He took my heart - he took my hand:
He showed me things I did not understand.
The song goes on, but at least you see: I had found the one man I thought I could stand behind.
When I later found the following card:
George Washington with his wife Martha
"Behind every successful man there is a woman."
I just had to give it to him. She was pretty straight forward (cheeky), because it went on as follows:
"If there’s no one standing behind you yet, I would like to fill out an application."
That was, please, no marriage proposal; that was just SERIOUS(=Ernst) fun!
And now we've been married for over 40 years! My wish came true, so to speak, and I have a man next to, behind, in front of and under - not over - whom I am allowed to stand by.
Ernst almost overran the photographer when he ran out of church with me for joy.
To be honest, it wasn't always just a must; marriage is a school. It's not just “like” a school; it is actually a school and I had a LOT to study! (Luckily he is also a patient teacher. :-)
I also learned a lot that way. He also. (Sometimes I thought it would be good, he would learn so quickly too. :-)
It is not always easy to stand behind a man. In our society women learn that women have to “develop”, “discover”, “realize”, and the underlying idea is, “You have to free yourself from the yoke of submission and do what YOU want!”
Building a happy marriage sometimes means doing hard labor.
It is true that sometimes during our marriage I felt the need to want to be a little more. Sometimes I didn't pay enough attention to my role at home and gave free rein to my dissatisfaction. But what I learned from it:
My response belongs to my responsibility
If a situation doesn't suit me, I can scold and complain. But that only makes me ugly and ugly. If I make the best of it, then I am happy and beautiful (er).
My luck
I have learned:
the key to my happiness - I hold it in my own hand.
I've learned that if I stand by my husband, even if he makes a mistake, I am happier too. That doesn't mean that I never tell him if I think he's wrong. No no. Open communication is very important. But how? When I smile, he smiles too. And that's so nice!
For women who are thinking of getting married, I would simply like to warmly recommend: think carefully about whether you would like to stand next to, behind, in front of and under a man (with all his faults). Now you still have a choice. And choose the right one! Let yourself be well advised! Butterflies are dangerous.
When Ernst and I had difficulties, I went to the USA with the children. We visited my old Sabbath school teacher and I told him a little about my suffering. I was amazed when he didn't take a step towards me. He explained to me, very dearly, that I had decided in favor of this man, that he was a nice person and now it's about making something good - the best of it.
Family happiness in the 'new' home in Eastern Switzerland - home sweet home - happiness alone
So I came back to Switzerland and decided, with God's help, to make something good out of it. And it turned out very well too! Not always easy, but the work has paid off (and still pays). You can choose between love and happiness.
Now I am very happy that Ernst persuaded me to take this privilege of writing to you ...
Then I remember the song I wrote for him. So it goes on:
"He made my life complete. He brought me happiness,
and every time I said "I can't!" He made me do my best. "
He added to my life and brought me joy
and every time I said
"I can't do that, he made me do my best."
Apparently that impressed me about him even then. Yes, marriage - and any relationship you take SERIOUSLY(=Ernst) - is a school. Fortunately, most relationships are voluntary. The only question is whether we want to learn something. DO YOU WANT THE SAME ?
In any case, he was right again in this case: I even noticed that I could write more. :-)
I wish you a wonderful week. See you the Wednesday after next; then with the topic FROM WOMAN TO MAN.
Then another song comes to mind: "If God gave me the chance to do it all again, I'd choose you again."
