What’s important to you? What’s not so important? What’s urgent? Maybe these questions are uncomfortable. How do we spend our time – our lives? Is there some unrealized potential we might discover?
An Example from Antiquity
Once a Greek orator by the name of Demosthenes wanted to present an important subject to a group of elite Athenians. As he spoke, he noticed they were not listening very well; they seemed distracted. So he stopped his discourse and told them what he was about to say was very important. Then he told the following story:
“Two men rented a donkey and shared the cost for a journey that would begin in Athens. Because it was extremely hot, they both wanted to walk on the shady side of the donkey, and they both claimed to have rented the donkey’s shadow.”
Then, abruptly, Demosthenes started to leave. His audience reacted quickly and begged him to finish his story.
Finally he gave in and continued his speech.
His words were packed with meaning: “You Athenians! How is it that you are so interested in a story about a donkey’s shadow yet unwilling to listen to much more important matters?”
Are things any different today?
How quickly we allow our attention to be captured by trivial matters and forget other much more important things!
Why is that? Why are we so unmindful and easily distracted?
Characteristics of Trivia
No one would like to admit that his or her life is full of meaningless odds and ends, or that he or she is not really sure what is important. Perhaps we think whatever we do is important.
Isn’t it true that much of what we say is basically hot air? We often speak out of habit, but what we say is not of much benefit to anyone.
When do our words matter? When are our deeds significant? When are our work, hobbies and free time meaningful?
Is it possible that people who don’t have any definite goals in life could fall into an abyss of meaninglessness without realizing it? Do you know anyone like that?
How do people find worthy goals? On what do they base their decisions? Is it, perhaps, their values? Where there is no value, is there no meaning?
Is enjoyment what makes life worthwhile?
Does material wealth like a house, car or yacht add meaning to life?
Is a life with as much power and influence as possible meaningful? What other conditions might make it true?
What is left after 40 years of work during which a Mercedes moved into the garage, but the family fell apart?
What’s left at 60, when, after having packed as much pleasure as possible into one’s life, the doctor bills roll in like a flood and you never get to enjoy your retirement? Your grandchildren would be sad to lose their grandfather, from whom they could have learned so much!
What’s left, when the lights dim on movie stars and politicians and their glory ends in loneliness and depression?
Our value, that is, our self-worth (BLOG), often seems to be built on false assumptions.
Time is our most valuable asset. What do we do with it? Do we just kill it? Wouldn’t that be a shame?
What do you think of the following statement?
“We must turn away from a thousand topics that invite attention. There are matters that consume time and arouse inquiry, but end in nothing.
The highest interests demand the close attention and energy that are so often given to comparatively insignificant things.” MH 456
Marks of Importance
When do we notice that something important has happened? When do you realize that you have said something important? How can we distinguish between important and unimportant matters?
In order to put more color and light into our lives, we have to use our time and energy wisely. But, how?
Critical Questions
How Do I Manage My Time?
What do I gain for my life by spending my evening watching TV and being entertained? Is it really worth my time?
What does time mean to me? Am I just waiting for retirement, because I know I’ll have time THEN? Isn’t time important now? What might I accomplish if I were more efficient with my time and wasted it less on trivialities?
Time is money. That’s what they say. Is money, at least, important to me? If so, time must also be. I can buy things with money. I can buy things of value and high quality, but money can also be used for inferior goods. Sometimes I realize the true value, or lack thereof, of an item after the purchase has already been made.
How do I treat myself?
How often do I go to the doctor’s? Am I healthy, or do I get sick easily? Why haven’t I stopped smoking, although I know it’s going to ruin my retirement? Why don’t I exercise, even though I know it’s extremely important for my health?
Do my feelings of inferiority sometimes reveal themselves in the way I treat my body? Do I understand my own value? Is the way I eat, drink and spend my time an indication of my self-worth? Do I think so little of myself that, subconsciously, I am slowly committing suicide?
How do I treat my loved ones?
Test: When I eat with my loved ones, where are my thoughts? Are they in my own sphere, revolving around my own problems? Or do I think about the people I’m eating with? Do I think about what they might be going through, their hopes and needs?
The first step towards improvement is always recognition of a need. To become aware of where my thoughts are centered is necessary before I can change their direction. If I think about my friends and family members, I will soon discover they could use my help. Until now, they may have been forced to handle everything alone, which can be a heavy burden.
Let’s take our most important people seriously and not leave their destinies to chance. Let’s take the responsibility and help our loved ones carry their burdens so they can live more balanced lives.
How do I handle important and unimportant matters?
Once I have learned to distinguish between important matters and trivia, my life will never be the same! Success in accomplishing this task is related to self-awareness and self-worth, which, in turn, correlate with my basic values and principles of life.
These values and principles will finally facilitate the setting of priorities for my life.
It would make absolutely no sense to sit in front of the boob tube every evening and squander my most precious possession, my life, would it?
Why shouldn’t I do something useful with my time?
Decisions, decisions. Multitudes are in the valley of decision! Sometimes we make courageous decisions on New Year’s Eve. Don’t put it off till then. Just do it!
What important questions help me find meaning in life?
Here are a few questions you may find helpful:
Who am I really?
What are my personal goals? If I continue living my life as I am, where will it take me?
What do I want to experience in my marriage, with my family and friends? Do I want happiness for myself? Do I want to share it with others?
What are some dangerous energy and time wasters that I have to eliminate from my life so my usefulness and performance will not be hindered?
What can I do with the extra time and energy to become an asset for my family?
Who might help me with my resolutions? Is there someone I could team up with?
Thank you for your attention.
The highest art is to ask the right questions. The next highest art is to find the right answers. Neither is easy.
