Having fun together is a key element in healthy relationships
Healthy relationships are not necessarily easy and free of conflicts.
Actually, the strongest couples are those who have been together the longest who are best prepared to tackle conflicts in a positive, mature way. They have an inner motivation to grow and improve their skills, not only as individuals, but also as romantic partners.
Healthy couples . . .
1. Compliment each other in Public
Most people would agree that it makes a difference whether we speak positively or negatively about others. How wonderful it is to be with people who think and speak positively! It’s easy to feel comfortable around them.
Let’s open our eyes to see the beauty, and not the little mistake in an otherwise charming portrait, remembering that those who tend to think negative thoughts are probably motivated by a personal problem they carry within themselves. That’s a challenge that would definitely be worth taking on!
"Sweetheart, you’re such an amazing hostess!"
2. Always find time for one another
People in healthy relationships regularly invest time in each other.
Some examples: walking the dog toAether after the kids are tucked in, reading a book together, watching TV (usually one-way communication), walking hand in hand, enjoying a mutual hobby or learning something new together. Especially nice: praying together.
An evening walk in the fresh air, spiced with smatterings of delightful conversation – a very healthy recipe!
3. Give themselves the gift of humor
"Back when we were getting to know each other we used to laugh a lot. But now that real life has taken over, neither one of us feel much like laughing." Hey, hey, things don’t have to be that way. And they certainly don’t need to STAY that way! Have you ever heard the saying, “Where there’s laugh, there’s hope.” No? Neither have I. J But it’s true. If you can still laugh, there’s good reason to hope things can improve. Nothing helps solve serious problems like a touch of good humor!
Of course, we must remember that there are serious challenges in life that require all of our energy in order to be understood and solved. (In unhealthy relationships, these valid difficulties are unfortunately often ignored.) But even when we have to deal with serious problems, we should never allow them to rob us of our joy and gratitude, which can serve as basic motivators, and giving humor space and time can certainly help us there.
There are many good reasons to laugh - not at the expense of others
4. Recognize and dwell on each other’s positive qualities
It is often easier to recognize the negative characteristics in one’s partner, especially since dwelling on those things can boost one’s own feeling of value. However, those who have a more or less healthy feeling of self-worth have no need to put others down; they can enjoy lifting up and showing their appreciation of others. In order to recognize this, we need empathy. Thinking about what the other is feeling and caring to understand the true root of a problem, as far as possible, is a valuable skill.
What do you think, are the ladies often ahead of the men on this point ?
Gentlemen, how often have we been spoiled with delicious food, which we love so much!
5. Forgive instead of holding a grudge
Everybody knows we all make mistakes. So why do we let conflicts arise because of them? When mistakes have been made and the perpetrator admits it and apologizes, and life goes on without allowing emotional distance to estrange a couple, that’s a great victory that deserves some applause! Anyone who can do this is on a path that leads to happiness.
Team players don’t always have to apologize: automatic forgiveness is a basic foundation in their relationship – whether in a soccer or in a marriage. Imagine a successful soccer team where every player apologizes every time he makes a bad pass. Impossible. Automatic forgiveness in a relationship is a characteristic that demonstrates high quality.
Instead of criticizing, why not help and build each other up, encourage, go forward, be friends and show understanding and compassion?
In all of these suggestions, the attitude of love, friendship, partnership and team playing is a sign of maturity in healthy relationships. How can one achieve that level of maturity? Good question. We’ll cover that another time. For now, I’ll just wish you a great week.
