Children learn amazingly quickly, especially from each other. Their intrinsic motivation is a gift that must be carefully guarded and kept on the right track. In this venture, the most important thing to keep in mind is the desired destination. The following information should help you to reach your goal.
Examples
Petra, 15 months old, is sitting in the shopping cart with her eyes riveted to her mom’s iPad. She is oblivious to her surroundings and doesn’t notice when her mother pushes her passed her favorite cornflakes.
Leo, 8 years old, turns on the TV when he gets home from school, and it stays on until he goes to bed.
Alicia, 13 years old, loves her smartphone and texting. Last month she sent over 3000 text messages. That makes about 100 each day.
These kinds of examples are becoming more and more common. Some parents realize their family time is nearly non-existent. Spending time together doesn’t seem to be a serious alternative to the world of media.
The Good Old Days
Back in the old days, life was different. We used to go outside and play. We learned how to win and lose in a social context with our friends. We also learned how to empathize and think about each other’s needs. Today, fear of kidnapping drives many parents to keep their children indoors.
Sometimes the older generation surprises us. Playing chess and other games is like fitness for brains and can keep older brains young.
Toddlers
How can we heal our world, or at least the part of the world that involves our children and families? Studies show:
The less a child is exposed to the world of media the better
Children under the age of two show absolutely no advantages from the use of media. At that age, they should be discovering their three dimensional world and developing their five senses; taste, smell, touch, sight and hearing. It has been shown that when small children watch a children’s program like Sesame Street, which would be fine for older children, it has a negative influence on their language development.
Language is best developed through personal communication
Generally speaking, there is a direct correlation between a child’s ability to speak and the time his or her parents spend in communication with him or her. When parents watch TV in their children’s presence, the children are cheated out of their parents’ attention and an opportunity to develop their communication skills. When there is always some program running in the background, a child’s ability to concentrate is reduced. This is also true of their cognitive abilities, memory and reading comprehension.
Watching TV just before going to bed has a negative effect on our quality of sleep and thereby influences our whole next day. Reading a good book is the best way to wind down at the end of the day.
A child’s bedtime is a time of great potential. If a child goes to bed happy, positive results will be visible the next day. Giving your child your undivided attention at bedtime (see BLOG) will fill his or her emotional tank with love, generate inner peace and ensure a good night’s sleep.
More Suggestions
Avoiding the television will undoubtedly cost some effort. A biblical principle states that bad things cannot just be rejected, but should be replaced with something better. A child will quickly become accustomed to the convenience of watching television or playing video games, but the advantages produced by more creative activities will more than justify the extra effort.
Here are some ideas for creative activities:
Drawing: You can put a big drawing pad or even a roll of old wallpaper with some colored pencils on the floor. Kids love this kind of art, especially when one of the parents is nearby.
Cardboard: You can use cardboard for countless projects. Build a playhouse, paint it, cut it into interesting pieces of art, make telescopes and binoculars with empty paper towel and toilet paper tubes. These are just a few suggestions.
Kids’ Cupboard: Choose a special cupboard for the kids and fill it with various household articles like cups, spoons, cans, bowls and other things they can use to copy you and “work” with you in the kitchen. Children can actually help in the kitchen and household earlier than we give them credit for. It will take a bit longer, but they will learn and develop a good sense of value by being able to help.
Water: Water games are always well loved. When the weather permits and it can be done outside in a small tub, that’s wonderful! Sometimes it’s enough to have a big cup and a small cup to pour back and forth or you may find some little leaves or pieces of wood that float. If you start something and make it look interesting, your child will join you with gusto!
Toy Box: If you make it a habit to exchange the toys in the toy box regularly, so the children don’t always have EVERYTHING to choose from, they will be more interested in their older toys longer and will look forward to the element of surprise in their toy box. In this way, a toy that hasn’t been used for a time can suddenly look more interesting.
Store: The experience of shopping can be brought into the child’s realm and enjoyed repeatedly, at no cost to the parents. You just take a few objects from the household, set up an improvised store with an entrance, a bell and a box for the cash register, some marbles, pebbles or shells for the cash and invite the guests to come shopping. Children love this kind of play acting, especially if you will be their customer and buy something from them.
Depending on the time of year, you can go exploring together. Where do animals like to hide? What do they eat? What do they like to do all day (or night) ? Discovering and studying the secrets of nature is a good way to strengthen your child’s (and your own) frontal lobe.
When children are very young, it is advisable to avoid all media. They get into it much too quickly anyway, especially if they have older siblings who are allowed this and that. The older children should be well informed of your rules and should also take active measures to guard the little ones.
We now know that a child’s brain should not be confronted with digital media before the age of 9. That would be ideal. Of course, we also know that reality challenges us to do it earlier. In that case, clear rules and the consistent enforcement thereof are needed and would be best for the children.
That will be a subject for later.
Wishing you a cozy week. J
Ernst
