‘Be cool’ is the greatest imperative among our youth. These values are built up in childhood. If you want esteem and respect, recognition and attention, then you have to find ways to be cool or you will be a loser.
How Do Our Children Learn?
Marketing?
The marketing experts are too shrewd to be exposed. They strive to connect their products to parents' needs. You have to have virtual reality glasses because everyone else has them too. If possible in a better version. You need to get it soon to be 'in' and 'cool'. Therefore, new products are constantly available in these areas. Business is booming because their appeal is overwhelming.
Therefore, digital learning is often inevitable in schools too. Drawing and modeling is losing its fascination in the face of such modern digital toys.
New products are needed so that these “new” children's needs can also be satisfied.
How important is it to know what a really important gift for children is! Children can only hope that their adult companions will be good guides, not seducers. For if they are seducers, then the children also become seducers. Seducers protect seducers.
New products are needed so that these “new” children's needs can also be satisfied. Even in nature, this can be forgotten. Modern toys can do that! How important is it to know what a really important gift for children is! Children can only hope that their adult companions will be good guides, not seducers. For if they are seducers, then the children also become seducers. Seducers protect seducers.
Circumstances
People adapt to the circumstances. Somehow they manage everywhere. Even in the North Pole. Children are raised everywhere, even in extreme living spaces.
Our brain is sensational. It is through learning that we develop our neural brain connections. These circuits are unique and culturally different. This growing into one's own culture becomes everyone's potential. The structure of the brain is strongly influenced by learning.
Children's brains are preprogrammed even before they are born. Therefore every child is different. Before birth, it was the mother's tones that influenced the brain. These neural behavior patterns are familial, cultural and very important. These should be valued, the individual should be accepted. Making sounds with the mouth, building a tower with building blocks, repeating it and learning the language with it, and then all of school learning, that should be trained through practice. This is how potential development works.
The child experiences himself as a subject in this daily learning. The more it experiences acceptance, the more it feels connected to the environment. The self-learning process is important to develop. Parents would like to direct this process themselves. Sure, it has to be prepared for this society. But where are the limits.
Children need companions, role models, not constant evaluators
The adults who are responsible for the upbringing want to steer the children in their desirable direction. They have their own goals. From playful fun, it becomes the object of the ideas, instructions, evaluations, support and educational measures of the parents. This seems normal, but it can have dramatic effects on the child. It notices that it no longer meets the expectations and expectations of the parents.
We parents and teachers are often not aware that we often treat children as objects instead of subjects, that is, we educate them for our own benefit and ideas, perhaps even proud of their performance, with which we plant them from their own system into ours . The child should learn what we consider important and right. After all, it is a child and cannot know what is important and right for it. Logical!
We parents and teachers are often not aware that we often treat children as objects instead of subjects, that is, we educate them for our own benefit and ideas, perhaps even proud of their performance, with which we plant them from their own system into ours .
The child should learn what we consider important and right. Be better than others, defeat, win, even be better than me. After all, it is a child and cannot know what is important and right for it. Logical!
Basic Needs of Children
Reliable Connection and Autonomous Development
These two basic needs of children are often neglected, which, for example, can lead to a phase of defiance. The child has to come to terms with it, find its own solution and overlay unpleasant feelings with pleasant ones or bridge any pain.
Through playful experimentation, children can override such dilemmas. The better they learn to cope with it, the more successful they seem to be. They will then try the same as their role models, namely to use other people for their purposes and ideas.
Power and Influence are Developed in This Way
Children who fail to meet these challenges often tend to make themselves the objects of their negative reviews in order to get out of this pain. These children tend to like each other less and less and eventually get sick because of it.
Both those children who learn to make others their objects and goals, and those who make themselves the object of their negative evaluations and thus regard themselves as incapable, both have to perform a technically difficult brain function for this learning process. You have to learn to override the neural networks that cause your pain with other thoughts.
What Makes Children Strong?
The joy of discovering yourself
Self-learning processes,
make autonomous decisions,
experience a reliable connection,
these experiences make children strong. With such experiences they try to overcome the pain. And most of them manage it. But then they no longer feel the same joy and passion as before.
Resignation or Rebellion
Their natural need for autonomy becomes a constant struggle against paternalism, and their longing for connection changes into rejection and indifference towards the environment. You seem strained and driven. When they play, they want to, yes, they have to be better than the others and want to win. Children with a strong ego tend to actively protest, even rebel. If you learn this early on, it can accompany you throughout your life.
Others, on the other hand, withdraw, tend to be anxious and have little self-confidence. You resign. The carefree and open-mindedness of the children is gone. The more this affects their development, the more it will affect them for life.
We hold it because it is experienced everywhere as normal. We experienced it that way ourselves. It complies with the norm. But that doesn't mean it's good or optimal.
A person can always be seduced when he is needy, when he has an unsatisfied need. The seducers know that very well. They always offer something to be seduced, even if it only offers alternative satisfaction.
Attention Seduction!
Connectedness and security are very important to us all. We somehow seek to satisfy these basic needs until we get there. But the way we try to do this often runs through seduction. We want to get this satisfaction mostly through achievement and recognition in order to be accepted into the community. Making self-worth dependent on performance is dangerous for our quality of life. (BLOG)
It starts as a toddler. It then continues in school, training and professional life. It is exhausting to strive for recognition all your life. Someone who has to do this is no longer a free person but a needy one, and such are optimal victims for seducers.
Fortunately, even if the brain has been deformed, it can be changed to the last. Therefore it is never too late to free someone from these entanglements, to DEVELOP. There are still games and gifts that help not to get entangled but to evolve.
Fortunately, even if the brain has been deformed, it can be changed to the last. Therefore it is never too late to free someone from these entanglements, to DEVELOP. There are still games and gifts that help not to get entangled but to evolve.
Not seducible!
There are few children who cannot be seduced by gifts. But how must these be developed so that they do not fall for seducers?
Such children pretty much know what they want.
They only do what they really care about. You do this fully motivated, with total dedication and of your own accord. Often a playful lightness can also be seen. With these qualities, they do not fit so well into daycare centers and schools. Adults often react awkwardly to such children because they are difficult to raise. Praise and blame hardly have any effect on them. Gifts have no effect either.
Therefore, many of them are sent to doctors and psychologists. They often receive medication there. Some quickly become artists or inventors, setting up their own 'company'. They like to get involved in an important cause and do 'their thing'. It is not uncommon for them to be extremely successful.
Many of the well-known entrepreneurs, poets, artists and inventors are such personalities. Others consider you gifted. Many then believe that genetic predispositions are responsible for this.
But there are many personal and social skills (EQ) gained through educational work that are responsible for their success. The joy of discovery and creativity is unbroken with them. Joy in creativity and imagination is what drives them, so to speak. Thanks to their imagination, they always manage to implement their ideas. The success that they inevitably receive builds their confidence. They don't want to prove to others, but to themselves what they're made of. Their intrinsic motivation was not destroyed as it was with the others. (BLOG)
They did not gain their special skills through so-called educationally valuable toys, but rather because they tried out what can be made of something at every opportunity and the available possibilities. You can do something with water, stones, wood, grass, dishes, whatever comes into your fingers. Whether at home, in the great outdoors, in kindergarten, you will find exciting challenges everywhere.
The Most Important Gift
Sure, these children also received presents. But these gifts were no more attractive than the cordless drill from the tool cabinet. There are gifts that help protect the children from seduction.
The most important gift that all children need cannot be bought anywhere. You need a safe haven. Then they can unfold. The harbor does not have to be luxurious, it arises all by itself when a child feels that they are loved by their companions. You feel what love really is. You will notice the difference between “I love you” and “I love you the way you are”. Unconditional trust in the child opens up their potential. It's an important part of the port. (BLOG)
The safe haven is the most important gift we can give them. All children bring their irrepressible joy in carefree, self-designed games with them. Discovering and shaping is their natural behavior. You love adventure. They love to play, the more the better.
Adults often find play to be unimportant. We often think we can interrupt their games. We do not notice what we can destroy in the process.
Our efficiency thinking is dangerous for the children. We don't have to evaluate everything. Let's just be attentive and watch their behavior and creations. It doesn't matter so much how well the child does something.
Adults often find play to be unimportant. We often think we can interrupt their games. We do not notice what we can destroy in the process.
Our efficiency thinking is dangerous for the children. We don't have to evaluate everything. Let's just be attentive and watch their behavior and creations. It doesn't matter so much how well the child does something.
Thoughts from the book by Gerald Hüther and André Stern “What do we give our children”
