At the beginning of a relationship, sexuality usually works very well. But there often comes a time when it no longer really works. Maybe it's the partner who allows herself to keep correcting herself. This can bring the partner to the point that he believes he can no longer do anything right. This unsettles and can strain a relationship so much that it is abandoned.
Reaction To Criticism
Most of us 'hate' constant criticism and correction. Many - especially the melancholic temperament (see LINK) - then react with withdrawal. When it comes to intimate things, i.e. our sexuality, we are particularly sensitive. The partner then begins to protect himself and builds up a safety wall, which can sometimes become very high, so that a really intimate atmosphere is no longer possible.
Loving pleasure can only develop in an atmosphere of trust and mutual acceptance. So it's no wonder that our sex lives are changing and you can no longer be fully woman or fully man.
Even as a child you learn - or not - how to deal with criticism. It seems to me that more and more people are struggling with it. Our pride keeps us from being proactive and constructive.
Develop Understanding
Sexuality in partnership thrives on the interplay between leading and being led. If a man constantly feels like he is doing nothing right, he will struggle to develop his masculine energy in sexuality. This means, among other things. be creative to accompany his wife in her lust so that she can let go.
There is a trend that the woman seems to be more receptive while the man likes to be active. For example, a woman who has been alone for a long time may feel the need for a man to put his arms around him, while in the same situation the man likes to hug his partner.
These roles can sometimes be swapped. Men often insist on being allowed to live their masculine energy.
Thinking, feeling and acting FOR EACH OTHER - that is what will also have a positive effect on intimate togetherness.
Men Usually Want To Be Proactive
This tendency is mostly real. But if a woman constantly reacts with: "No, not like that, no, not here", it will hardly build up the mutual desire. Of course it is important that everyone, and especially women, can express their needs. And if she can do it in a way that doesn't hurt her partner, then both are winners.
As a man, it is important to seek dialogue with your partner outside of sex. It is not easy to report emotional injuries. The more often they occur, the more important it is to talk about them and strive for consensus.
So why not ask how your partner would like to be touched, what she likes and dislikes. There is just Ver"Done watching TV!"
"You're going to bed now!" says the mother with unequivocal emphasis. The little daughter reacts to this: "Then I'll just ask the daddy."
The parents know that the daddy will let his girl watch TV for another fifteen minutes. The child is then happy and the mother feels disadvantaged in her educational efforts.
But do parents always have to agree?
Different educational ideas are probably the most common reasons for a parental row. No wonder, because after all we all grow up in a different ‘upbringing system’ that leads to different values and thus allows us to make different decisions.
….
Wir Männer haben gelernt, uns in Konkurrenz zu behaupten. Wir wollen gewinnen, koste es was es wolle! Da ist es nicht einfach, genug Demut zu haben und dem Partner mehr Platz und Aufmerksamkeit zu geben.
Optimization
Finding the way to shared pleasure is not always easy. But when husband and wife can connect with their needs and help each other constructively, then it is much easier for them to find good ways. If both discuss together and do not react hurt, so that the partner is also hurt, then maturation is likely.
It is important that the woman can be completely woman and the man can be completely man. It is up to both of them to find out what that means in reality. If they can help each other and teamwork can develop, then things are looking promising.
A woman who appreciates her husband and a man who likes his wife is the best prerequisite for a future together.
Any married couple that makes the effort to come together, resolve conflict, and be constructive will increasingly experience the quality of life as a couple.
Summary
Being subject to constant criticism does not promote lust. It is therefore important to find out in a conversation what needs both of you have. It is valuable when male and female characteristics can be accepted and lived out. Usually the men want to be allowed to lead and the ladies want to be spoiled. Right?
