Melancholies – sensitive, analytical, faithful friends. Their motto: "This is not going to work!"
Dear Reader, after reading this blog, if you recognize yourself as a melancholy, may I ask you to give it a Like? And when you read the other temperaments, please do the same, but only twice in total. In this way, we can see which temperaments read these blogs. Thanks in advance.
One blog has already been posted on the subject of the four temperaments. If you would like to read it, click here: 4TOverview 4T-Sanguine
The Melancholy Partner
They live in the past, are pessimistic and hard working. They can easily get lost in details, which can “waste” a lot of time. Their ability to care about minutiae is a skill that makes them useful most everywhere. Their homes are orderly. They are faithful to their friends in the most trying circumstances. Mature melancholies are veritable treasures as partners. Melancholy men tend to take longer and need more encouragement to propose than sanguines and cholerics.
Emotions
Here is a description of melancholy strengths and weaknesses:
Melancholies are diametric opposites of sanguines. Their emotional world is strongly developed. Unfortunately, they are often given to toxic thinking (Blog), which has a negative influence in their daily lives. They have a flare for analysis, which sometimes causes unnecessary rabbit chasing. They are quick to recognize potential difficulties because one of their favorite questions is, “What if?". For them, “the worst case is the first case” to be considered.
Feeling Fluctuations
Emotional highs are few and far between. Living in the past and working through various impressions is great cause for reflection. Their feelings are not quick to change, but are as steady as their few friendships. Once a friend, always a friend. They are content to be alone and generally don’t need anyone’s help. If you can get a melancholy to laugh, you are to be congratulated!
For other temperaments, a melancholy’s perfectionistic tendencies can sometimes be a hindrance to getting along with him or her. Melancholies often recognize faults in others, which is not always an advantage in building relationships. They are also very introspective and just as critical of themselves. This constant self-analysis makes them less open to others. When something goes amiss at the initial contact with a new acquaintance, they will generally withdraw. They are not easily impressed, but when something touches them, it is never forgotten.
Activities
Their love for details is a strong basis for their appreciation of art, music, beauty and everything that exhibits excellence. Playing an instrument well is an indication of melancholic tendencies: reading music, playing and practicing all require a willingness to work on details. On the other hand, melancholies do not enjoy being in the limelight. They are not so quick in making decisions, but when they have set a goal, they don’t give up easily. One of their greatest challenges is to overcome their (overdeveloped) desire for perfection.
Occupation and Hobbies
Thanks to their skill in handling details, they are welcome in every profession where high quality is required. Some melancholies are meticulously orderly, while others tend to be chaotic. As parents, meticulous melancholies are strict and unbending. They tend to set the bar too high and have difficulty expressing the deep love they feel for their offspring in a way that they can understand. Their children often feel unloved, because they cannot be perfect.
Challenges
Because melancholies are normally the offspring of melancholy fathers or mothers (perfectionists), they also have the same tendencies. The daily battle of finding themselves and recognizing their self-worth can be a draining process for them and the people around them. Their strong fear of not being good enough and not being loved needs to be analyzed and replaced with high quality love. Melancholies don’t let others get too close, even though it could help them. As long as they hang on to their egocentricity, reject the idea of making positive changes, don’t recognize that their fear and self-involvement is not just a fault, but sin, they cannot be helped. Here are three things they can do to remedy their greatest needs:
Practice replacing critical thoughts with positive.
Deliberately choose to show interest in and do things for others.
Develop an attitude of gratitude.
When melancholies understand the huge potential that lies outside their own limited sphere, which could make them and the people in their surroundings happier, anything is possible. The mature melancholy temperament is especially valuable and constitutes a true asset for the environment.
There are many melancholies in the Bible: Moses, David, both Johns and Luke, to name a few. You can test this statement by doing a personality study on them. :-)
Turning a critical look into a loving one, recognizing oneself to be a beloved creation of God with an important mission in life – this will make life worth living!
If you have recognized yourself as having many melancholy characteristics, you are invited to click on the LIKE button below. Many thanks!
If you are interested in doing a temperament test, you are welcome to write me at the following email address and I will be happy to send you one: ERNST.ZWIKER@YAHOO.COM.
