Amazingly enough, there ARE people who deal well with stress. We can learn a lot about stress management from them. (In this picture, my wife is a good example!!!)
Dear Reader, I heartily recommend reading through the first three parts on the subject of stress before continuing with this one. They contain some tips about stress management you won’t want to miss: definition, causes and prevention of stress are discussed.
Stress Management
Now you have reached the point where stress is a fact of life – your life. Stress can come in many different forms, with many different faces and from many different sources. In other words, there is quite a variety of stressors to be had. Now the game is on, and it’s your personal game of stress management. The trick is to find a healthy balance between tension and relaxation.
A Change of Terms
The term stress management focuses on stress and how to get rid of it. If we can move away from thinking about stress, we will actually be moving closer to our own resources or skills, the goal of which is to help us have a good feeling, namely relaxation. That’s the whole point of stress management.
A more positive term is resource management, which is another popular concept used in connection with stress management.
Rather than focusing on stress, a negative idea, we should use our energy to meet various challenges as they arise.
Resource Management
Analysis necessary
Analysis is necessary
It is important to take time to do a situation analysis. (BLOG – Causes of Stress) The better you know the causes, the easier it is to decide which solution to apply from your toolbox of resources.
It’s important to identify deep-seated patterns and break endless vicious cycles. Good friends or a good counselor can be a great help in this process. They can help us recognize points where we are either under- or over- challenged. If a person is not sufficiently challenged in daily life, he or she can experience a massive stress reaction, which must be met with appropriate measures. This condition is called boreout.
Each person is different and must find the form of stress management that best fits his or her specific needs. One of the most successful resources available is exercise. To be more specific, aerobic exercise.
Aerobic Exercise
I’m sure you recognize the subject of 'the importance of exercise' from last week’s blog on stress. Exercise is a “miracle drug” for many health challenges. If you take this point seriously and put it into practice, you will gain traction in every area of life.
Moderate endurance exercise serves to decrease stress and promotes the neuronal restructuring process of neurotransmitter secretion, which brings about balance and relaxation. Some fitting forms of endurance exercise are jogging, Nordic walking, swimming and cycling.
These should all be done in moderation, building up endurance over a period of time. We should make our first experiences with exercise positive ones. After all, we cannot expect to start off like a world champion. If we begin moderately and increase our endurance gradually, we will be most successful in the long run. The best and surest way to ensure success is to ally yourself with a friend or small group of like-minded individuals. Perhaps you have a friend, family member or neighbor who might share the same interest and goals. Remember that weather is never an excuse to stay at home. There is no such thing as bad weather; you just have to wear the right clothing.
Maybe you could involve the whole family in your sport activities! That would not only strengthen and improve your own health and theirs, but it could also be a fantastic bonding experience! Just think of the many possible benefits!
The Ability to Love
Another great resource is the skill to treat people kindly, even when they seem to be stressors. Remember:
It is easy to judge the actions of others when we set our own preferences as the standard!
We have a tendency to experience stress in our relationships with others when our own expectations are not fulfilled. Unfulfilled expectations lead to disappointments. If we are not careful with these, they can lead to frustration, which can then fester and turn into aggression. If we harbor these negative thoughts without working them out, we will find ourselves trapped in the vicious cycle of toxic thinking (see BLOG). This cycle must be broken as quickly as possible and replaced with positive thoughts in order to avoid permanent damage to our psyche and relationships.
Consider your own emotional intelligence, your social competence and your empathy (BLOG). Remember that every conflict is an opportunity to grow. If you recognize these opportunities and meet them squarely, rather than trying to avoid them, you can profit greatly.
Many equate love with warm feelings and romance, and these should, of course, be part of the package. However, in a mature love relationship, they are the product, not the motor. Wise decisions, values and principles are the qualities upon which our actions must be based in order to foster an environment where mature feelings can be nurtured. These feelings are not the basis for a solid relationship, but the product of it. These mature feelings are not caused by our own loneliness or our damaged past.
Those who practice their ability to love, who know what unconditional love is (BLOG) and apply it in their daily experience, will develop their characters more and more to become masters of circumstances. These are people who will not lose their cool because of external circumstances, but their inner peace will keep them calm in the face of difficulties. Isn’t it interesting that we find so many such examples in the Bible? That’s because faith can be a decidedly positive factor in this process of finding peace within (BLOG).
Setting Limits
People who love people always set limits. It may sound strange, but limits are an indispensable part of a wise lifestyle. Unconditional love (BLOG), for example, does not allow itself to be abused and destroyed. This is because this kind of love is founded in high self-worth. Those who can love others also love themselves. If a person hates him- or herself, how can he or she love anyone else?
Strive for Balance
Now it’s time to learn how to use our own resources in order to bring all the different areas of our lives into balance. Thanks to the ability to prioritize, we can adjust our time and energy investments to match the goals we set for ourselves.
Training Plan
All habits and attitudes that we would like to change can be systematically transformed into new habits and attitudes with the help of the following plan. The whole family can benefit from this transformation
It is best to begin with ONE attitude or ONE change. When a new habit has been formed, you can start working on the next one.
